December 31, 2011

Rescue Me # 2 (and a year in review)

We have decided to end the year here at Jowls of Fury on a high note. So let us introduce you to our second 'Rescue Me' hound.

His name is Livingston, and he is being taken care of by Hounds Haven Basset Rescue of Iowa. He is a 4 year old handsome boy who is looking for a forever home and a gotcha day to celebrate forever and ever.

How can you not love this face

My lady hound heart got all aflutter when I read his page. Mr. Livingston was found in rural Missouri - where I live! - running around as a stray dog. He had a really bad eye infection and the vet determined that his right eye doesn't produce any tears. This means he needs to have eye drops put in them to keep it moist and healthy. My heart breaks for this poor hound, because I hate medicine and the very idea of them putting it in my eyeball makes me want to bite someone. Livingston looks very rugged and in need of a lady hound's attention in that photo, squinting with his one eye that needs the eye drops. He is also afraid of people but loves little kids, kind of like Breezy. This means he was probably abused as a puppy. If he were around I would give him kisses and take care of him. But I'm sure he will find a good home with such a sweet face. If you would like to know more about Livingston you can find his page here, and you can find Hound Haven's page here.

So now on to the year in review! We have had a really busy year here at Jowls of Fury. We started new traditions like Famous Basset Hound Friday, and the other dumb ones that cats do. We tried to win prizes for Mango Minster but we weren't successful. We survived Snowpacolypse and we gave Breezy her gotcha day (although I didn't like her much at first). We had to deal with extra cats coming in the house and then we had to take the blog back from evil cats. We got to see our Michigan family this spring, and we got to go swimming at great-grandma's house and see our other family there. We didn't care for the swimming part. We had a basset GQ page (and hopefully we'll have another one soon), and we went on many car rides. Unfortunately I had to go to the vet's twice this year and I hope I never have to go again. I discovered how tasty cicadas were even if they were really noisy, and I rediscovered my dislike of daddy's walking habits. We began our HOSA dog training and we went to our favorite basset party event in the world, the waddle! We moved into a new house, one without so many steps! We visited a new dog park and we will be visiting it a lot in the future.

Oh and check out this really neat basset statue we got from Aunt Melissa, Uncle Zane, and puppy cousins Chopper and Aksel.

We have good puppy cousins

Plus grandma got me some new toys for Christmas, a new squeaky pig and a new ball.

Rosco is trying to steal my ball

Oh and Breezy is a big wuss about snow, it is the best part of winter.

I am in my element

But at some point you get cold and have to run inside for the heat!

OK enough of this, basset power activate!

So all in all it was a good year. We had our ups and downs but we ended it with a nice time and lots of love and family. We would be remiss not to remember the hounds we lost this year, so we dedicate our last blog post of 2011 to our hound friends (like Woody, Romeo, Cleo, and Flash) who are at the bridge waiting for their people to join them. If we forgot any other hounds who went to the bridge this year we apologize - please leave their name in a comment, we don't want to leave anyone out.

December 30, 2011

Famous Basset Hound Friday # 42


Today's famous basset hound Friday is a little late because it has been a busy day in JoF household. This morning started bright and early, when we woke Momma so she could make us breakfast and get preparation started for today's honorary basset hound. Today is Daddy's birthday and Layla, Breezy and I decided he could be today's famous (almost) basset hound.

So bright an early, we urged Momma to get under way (and after much grumbling and some caffeine, she did). The first step in the Daddy birthday plan was to assemble his big new grill. Grandma and grandpa thought Daddy should have a safer way to cook steaks that didn't involve matches, lighter fluid and charcoal so they gave him the great big box (which Momma said contained the grill). Well after many hours and a couple naps (for us hounds) the big box turned into a big shiny grill. I was very proud of how well Momma put it together and being that I am a gentleman hound will not divulge any of the "colorful" words Momma used when putting it together.
Here it is in all it's assembled glory. Any Daddy would be proud.

Next it was on to making Daddy his birthday cupcakes. He asked Momma to make Apple Pie cupcakes with cinnamon buttercream frosting. Now as the resident HOSA dog, I had to make sure that Momma was safe in the kitchen.
This work area is HOSA dog approved. Proceed with cupcake baking!

Shortly after Momma baked the cupcakes, we welcomed Daddy home in grand fashion.

video

The rest of the evening included making dinner, watching movies and giving Daddy the card we picked out just for him.

We know its not a basset but it's still a pretty cool card.


So here's to Daddy, our honorary famous basset hound. Happy Birthday Daddy!

Here is Daddy, "Grillin' like a Villain!"





December 29, 2011

A late Merry Christmastime

We have been gone for over a week, and it's time to get everyone updated!

We spent a big part of Christmas up at Grandma's house in Michigan. We saw Max and Maggie again, and also Griff and Remy and a new dog named Tinker. Tinker didn't get to run with us because she was tied to her car (her mama is afraid she would be too aggressive but she seemed fine to us - she had a thick fur coat and a really good howl, almost as good as mine). Now as you may recall, I did not always get along with Max and Maggie. However, I decided to try and be a good puppy cousin this year and have a good time. As it turns out they were much better behaved. I only had to howl at Maggie and Max every once in awhile. If Max tried the puppymaking game I threw him to the floor.

This happened a few times. I really am that smokin' hot

Now I still did not like Griff - he is such a big lummox and he runs into everything and his tail is like a furry wrecking ball - so I had to howl in his face quite a few times. Oh well, that's just the way family is at Christmastime.

Imagine this in motion, not a pretty sight

We had a white Christmastime, sort of. We got snow the day before and we had to go out and pee in it. Layla and Rosco thought the snow was great, while Max and Maggie didn't seem to care. I guess they are used to it, but I am a Missouri Hound at heart, and we do not do well with snowpacolypse, or whatever Layla calls it.

So... you're not going to carry me out there?

You expect me to pee WHERE?

But the highlight of the Christmastime was definitely the kids. I met the kids earlier this year - you might remember me and Miss Ashlee played basset princess and her personal chauffeur - and we got to see them again. The kids remind me of the good parts of my old home, the parts where I got to play with kids and chase them and protect them from lummox dogs like Griff. I did my best to protect everyone from everything but I am only one dog, and I can only do so much.

I couldn't protect everyone; Drake was OK but Ashlee got slobbered on

Another upside to the kids is that they are short and they drop food all the time. In fact we got lots of treats at Grandma's, way more than we do at home.

All you had to do was be patient

They didn't always eat everything and a patient dog got the goodies

I was starting to think about staying there forever but then we had to get in the car and go back home. Now the long car rides are not my favorite thing. I don't like to be jostled when I am sleeping and between the bumpy road, the packed car, and the lummox brother and sister I have, I got barely any sleep. Plus the cats - yes all five of them - were in on this car ride and I had a hard time sleeping when they needed to be constantly monitored so they didn't get out of the crate.

These conditions are horrible

That reminds me, Grandma's has other cats too. They are different from our cats and they also need to be closely monitored and possibly chased. This one cat named Maisy looks like a furry Ottoman that ran into a brick wall. She makes lots of noise and I tried to chase her a few times, but dad always stopped me.

If you don't keep them in line they get all Terminator on you...

Anyway... back to the car ride home. As I said, I did not enjoy myself, but mama's car ride home was even worse. She was really sick. Now normally when I get sick the best thing to do is try and have a treat and go lay in my crate for awhile. Well, mama didn't want any treats and the only crate had 5 cats and a litter box in it. So she toughed it out and rode most of the way home sitting up, but finally daddy told her to lay down in the back so she could get comfortable. That opened up the front seat for me, and I got to be the co-pilot!

You're doing great, but keep your eyes on the road

A co-pilot's job is making sure that daddy doesn't speed or hit anything, and not to let any slow dogs pass us by. I did my best but you can only do so much with such poor raw material.

I think that Shar-Pei just flipped us off

Floor it daddy we need to leave him in the dust!

Anyway, once we got home, mama slept for a long time and daddy went to the great-grandma's house for another Christmastime. I stayed home to make sure that darn Christmas Pig Monster stayed in the yard where he belonged. I thought I heard daddy come home later but it was just the neighbor, or possibly another Christmas Pig Monster joining forces. But no. Just the neighbor. Then the next day, daddy came home, and he brought my other grandma and grandpa with him! I was so excited to have someone else to lay upon!

Grandpa's lap is a pretty good place to take a nap

See what a beautiful bunch of ladies we are? And then there's Rosco...

Well we were all having a great Christmastime when who should appear at my doorstep but Evil Uncle Casey. I sprang from my bed to bite him and howl in his face, but his heart grew three sizes that day and he decided to make up for his earlier transgressions by giving us all a treat. I was suspicious at first, like maybe he had poisoned it or something, but Layla and Rosco wolfed theirs down and they didn't die or anything. So I ate mine and decided that Evil Uncle Casey was going to be known from then on as Not Too Bad Uncle Casey (until he screws up again).

So that was my Christmastime! Hope everyone else had a good one.

December 22, 2011

Where we've been

I'll bet you, as a regular reader of Jowls of Fury, have been wondering where we have been for the last few days, right? Well! Wonder no more! We are at one of our grandma's house, and she doesn't have very fast internet. That's why this message will be short and sweet. We just wanted to let everyone know that we are up here for Christmas and we will be back to faster internet by the end of the year. Until then everyone have a good holiday, take lots of naps, and watch out for Christmas Pig Monsters.

December 18, 2011

Stupid TV Commercial # 34

OK folks - it's Christmas time, and that means trees with toys that we are not allowed to play with, more crap in the way of our cat vantage points, and knick-knacks everywhere.  Generally I try and make the best of this time of year, but sometimes it just gets to be too much.

Case in point - TV commercials get even stupider this time of the year, if such a thing is possible.  Take the latest from candle company Glade.

What was in those candles anyway?

Korbin might like these candles a lot - they are apparently spiced with something.  Myself, I would be a little disturbed if my Christmas stuff started flying around the house when I lit a candle.  It might even dissuade me from buying those candles.  I would certainly quit using them if they made snowmen come to life and peer into my windows.  Other cats in my yard are bad enough, I don't need animated snow freaks wandering around out there.  And little flying reindeer cookies would be way too much for me.  I'd have to knock them out of the sky, much like any little birdies that make their way into my castle.

Stupid commercial.

December 16, 2011

Famous Basset Hound Friday # 41

This week's famous hound is another basset blogger. We only recently started reading his stuff but he has regular posts and he is a pretty good hound author. And for all our other basset blogging buddies, don't fret! You will all get to be famous hounds eventually. We have an entire list of hounds (blogging or otherwise) to go through and we don't want to bunch all the bloggers together.

So our newest famous hound is a handsome fellow by the name of Bentley.

The one on the left

Bentley has a mama and several aunties, and also a buddy named Turbo. They have lots of adventures and they are also accomplished hound chefs! If only mama would let us be hound chefs... we could make all kinds of cupcakes to eat. Bentley writes a blog called 'Bentley the Basset's Words of Wisdom'. Of course all hound's words are wise. Bentley and Turbo recently fought off some evildoers and he gets to go to work all the time. He also guards some really cool cars. Bentley is a 2-year old hound just like me!

And he's our latest famous hound!

December 15, 2011

The best place to sleep

As a hound, you have several options on where you choose to sleep. Sometimes you have to make the best of a non-ideal situation. While car rides are a lot of fun, the long ones that tend to require nap time usually involve lots of luggage. This does not make for a comfortable hound opportunity, but you can sometimes take advantage of properly placed luggage.

Laptop bags have nothing to do with laps as far as I can tell

The bed is a good place to nap, but usually you have to compete with a few other hounds for a good spot. Sometimes this is nice, especially on cold nights when you need to be warm, but other times it is just a bit too crowded. Now if you are a mighty hound like me you can just shove them out of the way, but if you are a feather duster like Rosco you are out of luck.

Three is a crowd

But the truly best place to sleep is next to mama. Daddy is OK but he is not as cuddly as mama, and he gets all twitchy when he starts to fall asleep. Sometimes I wonder if he is dreaming about bunnies or squirrels like I sometimes do. But it is annoying to be in a restful hound sleep and get jerked awake by him. Mama just sleeps soundly, like us hounds.

Yes, this is the best place to sleep

December 12, 2011

Christmas costumes and monster!

Rosco and Layla have been telling me about a Christmas tradition that we all have to go through each year. We have to wear costumes. Rosco even had to wear a beard and a hat once. I don't know how he got through it but he did. Well, yesterday was the day. I wasn't looking forward to it but at least we got a treat out of the deal.

It was utter chaos

As hectic as things were I have to say that I think I looked pretty good in my pretty Mrs. Santa Paws outfit. But I always do cut a stunning figure.

Mrs. Paws has nothing on me

Rosco and Laya were less well behaved with their costumes. They kept trying to take their hats off. Mama and daddy didn't even try the beard this year and I don't blame them - Rosco is a little brat and a beard on a lady hound is just ridiculous. Layla always tries to bite the hat band anyway.

Rosco never keeps his hat on

The beard would've gotten in the way of her antler hat

So the costume party ended (finally!) and we thought the perils of Christmastime were over. But we were wrong. Mama brought this big baggy thing out from the laundry room. It smelled like the outside and we were of course duty-bound as hounds to investigate it. She hollered at us and told us to quit walking on the pig. Well it didn't look like any pig to me! She taped it here and taped it there. Then she plugged it in (an electric pig at that!) and it started to inflate.

You might call this a pig but it is clearly a monster

Once he started to inflate mama was very happy. I am a bit suspicious about her now, I think she may have been brainwashed. Christmas Pig Monster was sitting there looking very smug in my living room and his fan was making enough noise that I couldn't have napped even if there weren't a monster sitting next to my TV. I began to formulate a plan but then mama's brainwashing went away and she told daddy to take the pig (AKA Christmas Pig Monster) outside. OK good, I thought, now I have a bit more time and perhaps I can kill him in the yard the next time I got out. Well, daddy took care of it for me. Christmas Pig Monster went in the front yard. He only comes alive when it is night time, and really that isn't such a bad deal because he will keep other dogs and cats out of our yard. Just so he doesn't come back in my living room again we have an uneasy truce.

He doesn't look too good right now

I vanquished him and saved Christmastime! No more photos please.

December 9, 2011

Famous Basset Hound Friday # 40

Wow it is hard to believe that we are getting close to an entire year of famous hounds. It seems like only yesterday we started it off with the original blog about them. How time flies! Time flies when you are having fun! Jowls fly on car rides!

This week's famous hound is a bit of a celebrity. We have actually been in the same place as him too! He visited the GABR waddle the first year we went! His name is Shooter, and he is the personal hound trainer of the Chicago Blackhawk's hockey player Patrick Sharp. Because the waddle is so close to Chicago he came to visit with his mama. I think his mama is a pretty lady, but my heart still belongs to Kirsten Dunst. I hope she doesn't read this and get jealous!

Scooter at the 2010 Waddle

Anyway. Shooter is very important in hockey. He has trained Patrick Sharp on how to stay on his feet and always be a good hockey player. Watch the video below for some training in action.


I think Shooter has done a pretty good job. You have to start training humans early on or they will start to think they run the place. In fact, he did such a good job training Patrick Sharp that they won the Stanley Cup, which evidently is the world's biggest treat container!

Who designed this thing anyway?

So there you have it, a hound who trained a person to run around on the ice with a stick and not get hurt! This is clearly a famous hound!

Handsome fellow. The human isn't too bad either, I guess

December 6, 2011

Rescue Me #1

So as I have blogged before, I am a rescue hound. Some foolish person decided once that they didn't want me anymore and gave me up for adoption. I went to live with some nicer people, but let's be honest - rescue facilities are way too crowded for hound lifestyle. I was so happy when mama and daddy rescued me, and have been living the good life ever since.

But this time of year I start to think about all those other hounds who are in rescue facilities or who are even luckier and get to live in foster homes. A foster home is better but it isn't the same as a forever home. These poor hounds have no family to love on them or feed them, and no one to play chase with. It was really bothering me all day, despite hours of napping to clear my hound mind.

So I am left with only one option. Dictation! I dictated to daddy that we should start a new tradition. Rosco has his Famous Basset Hound Friday, and the stupid cats get TWO traditions. It doesn't seem fair that us hounds only get one - it isn't called WHISKERS of Fury, no matter what McBoobs says.

He agreed with me, saying it was very selfless of me to want to help other hounds. He also said something about toning down the negativity on the cats, but I tune out any comments that have to do with those stupid hairballs. Anyway, this is our first entry in a new segment here at Jowls of Fury that we are calling 'Rescue Me'. In it, I will highlight a different basset hound rescue organization each week, giving some details about them and maybe mentioning a few hounds at their foster homes. I will also let you know if they do any rescue events like a waddle.

So our first rescue organization is the Michigan Basset Rescue. Their claim to fame is that they host the 'Original Basset Waddle'. Hey what a coincidence! We go to a waddle of our own. Looking at their site I see the Michigan waddle is in the spring while our waddle is in the fall.

We could do two waddles in one year! Dictation!

But as you can see from their website, they do lots of other things. They sell basset hound gifts, including a really cool cookbook written by basset chef de Hungry Hound. A few of their current hounds are awfully handsome, including Mr. Duke (an older basset gentleman who will eat anything - a hound after my own heart). So if you happen to live in Michigan or want to drive a long way to give a hound a forever home, check out Michigan Basset Rescue.

Oh yeah and here is their mascot!

December 4, 2011

Stupid TV Commercial # 33

Well as the dogs pointed out the other day - it's Christmas time. I have noticed that Christmas brings out a lot of stupidity in TV commercials. The dogs put up one about Target shopping, but they forgot how bad some of that company's commercials can be...


That woman is insane. Why would I want to go shopping there, if she might be there?

December 2, 2011

Famous Basset Hound Friday # 39

Oh boy! It's getting to be Christmas time! That means they will get out a tree with lots of little toys on it for me to play with! And we get to see our family again, including puppy cousins like Aksel and Chopper and Max and Maggie and Griff and Remy! And the kids! And a ten-hour car ride to see them all! And the Christmas Pig!



In case you can't tell I like Christmas time. But I'm not so excited about the Christmas Pig...

Anyway - it is in the spirit of Christmas time that I present to you our latest famous hound. Only because it is Christmas time, I actually present to you TWO yes TWO famous hounds! It's a two-for-one hound sale at Christmas time! And it's brought to you by the store Target. Now unfortunately there is a lot of other foolishness in the commercial they appear in, but the most important part is between 13-14 seconds in. That's where our famous hounds (we don't know their names but we must assume this is Santa and Mrs. Paws) come in!


Oh little hound of Bethlehem

But wait! Santa Paws has lost his beard! I wonder what happened? I grew a beard once...

Done!

November 30, 2011

Weird Word Wednesday # 19

How was everyone's Thanksgiving? We enjoyed a nice, quiet weekend to ourselves, with no yapping dogs or arguing family. Then the dogs came back and things went back to normal.

Anyway, here's the newest Weird Word. This week's (month's - so sue me) word is 'behooves'. It is used by people who want to sound intelligent as a way to say 'it is good for you to do this'. Used in a proper sentence, one might say 'It behooves the cat owner to feed them regularly, as to do otherwise invites certain death - and we don't mean the cat'.

But what does the word really mean? It sounds like it means 'the person who does this will get a nice set of hooves'. Sort of like 'bestow' or 'bequeath'. Come to think of it, those are all pretty weird words. Any way you slice it, I think I will stick to my paws.

Green Acres - 03x03 Love Comes to Arnold Ziffel
Leave the cross-species intermingling to the experts

November 28, 2011

I wish I had longer legs

My brother and sister are lucky. Breezy has really long legs and it allows her to jump on things I cannot hope to jump on, like the bed or the armrest on the furniture. This lets her make the most of her snuggle time with mama and daddy. I say this makes her less of a hound but she doesn't seem to care when she is snuggling.

She doesn't seem to care at all...

Rosco isn't any taller than me but he has more of a spring in his step because he is such a lightweight. He is able to stand on his hind legs for longer than me because he is so small. If I try and do that my basset bulk gets to be too much for me. Now don't get me wrong - I have really strong legs - but my beautiful basset frame is so sturdy that it is not made to be held up by only two legs. This allows him to counter surf (which he gets in trouble for) and help be a co-pilot when we go for car rides.

This makes me really jealous.

I just wish I had longer legs so I could get on the bed or be a co-pilot. It is embarrassing to have to get help up on the couch or the bed. I want to do it all by myself. But we all have our crosses to bear, whatever that means.

November 25, 2011

Evil Uncle Casey

Well what an interesting few days it has been. We got up very early the other day and went for a car ride. It was pretty long, and we went to grandma's house. Only this time it was my other grandma, and her house is different from the grandma's house I am used to. The first thing I smelled when I came in were cats, and they are all hiding upstairs still. I think this is pretty cowardly of them, they should come down and meet their hound cousins. Daddy tells me there are five of them here, just like at our house. But these cats are all like Nibbler, they are afraid of us hounds, even though we just want to chase them and pin them down and sniff and lick them.

Then later that day my puppy cousins Aksel and Chopper came over. Now as you may remember they can be kind of mean to me, but this time after a short round of howling they remembered their manners and were actually trying to play with us. Chopper likes our toy duckies and piggies and we all played chase and fetch and chew-squeak-squeak. Aksel though... well I guess Aksel is afraid of us for some reason because he always growls and shows his teeth when he gets near us. He has to wear a collar that pokes him in the neck to remind him we are peace-loving hounds. We all went on a walk together yesterday and he was fine outside, it's just inside that he is afraid of us. Hopefully he will get over that.

Then last night I met another uncle I have. His name is Casey and he seemed like a nice enough uncle at first. We all had Thanksgiving turkey and pie and other goodies and then we fell asleep on the couch watching football. I got up this morning and did my morning necessaries like eating and pooping, and then wanted to get up on the couch to have my morning nap, when I discovered this.

What is the meaning of this?

... what is going on here? Is this how Uncle Casey treats guests in grandma's house? Rosco, Layla and I got up and gave him the customary basset hound nudge, as if to say "Hey get your lazy butt off the couch, that is our job". He responded by petting us and pushing us down onto the floor. Well! Of all the nerve!

We are guests here, so we tried not to get too upset about this. Rosco tried to jump up on him, thinking perhaps he wanted us to snuggle with him some. We just met and all so I was not too comfortable with the idea. Well as you can see below Rosco didn't get to stay up there very long, he got pushed onto the floor again.

So much for that approach.

So at that point Uncle Casey had to get up and do his morning necessaries, and we took that as our sign that he was up and was going to be doing the important human things that humans normally do. I saw an opportunity to inherit a warm spot and I wasted no time.

There, that's better.

But I was wrong. Uncle Casey came back and kicked us off the couch so he could lay down and play video games. I gave up at that point, and then I remembered something I had been hearing on TV lately - it is Black Friday, the day that evil-hearted people spend the entire day pursuing unimportant things and ignoring the needs of basset hounds. Thus I have seen the true nature of my Evil Uncle Casey.

I guess this is how we treat basset hounds when we are Evil Uncle Casey.

November 19, 2011

HOSA public service announcement

Greetings readers! Rosco here, bringing you an important holiday update! Now as you know, the holiday of Tanksgiving is coming up. At first I thought 'What a strange holiday - giving each other tanks.' Then daddy explained it was actually a day to be thankful for what we have. It is also a day to eat a ton of food and sleep a lot. Or, as we bassets call it, Wednesday.

But the thankful part got me thinking about what I am thankful for. I am really thankful for my mama, daddy, sisters, cousins, grandmas, toys, treats, food dish, and bed. I am also thankful for the dog park, walks, car rides, and belly rubs. Most of those things are pretty safe but mama and daddy are in constant danger - and that's where the Hound Dog Safety Administration (HOSA) comes in.

Now your humans face multiple threats throughout the day. They include slipping and falling, but a good HOSA dog is ready to thwart these threats at a moment's notice.

Humans trip all the time

They also fall a lot too

Slippery floors are their worst enemy; they never bother to lick up puddles

So the only real option us HOSA dogs have is to be vigilant and be ready to act when necessary. I have included a few updates to these signs below, to give you some ideas on what to watch out for.

Well if you won't clean the puddles up I guess we have to catch you...

Us hounds have sturdy backs to catch your uncoordinated bodies!

Never fear human, HOSA dog is here!

But one of the most important things we can do is help a human who is choking on their food. Now a good HOSA dog needs to understand what basset safety researchers refer to as the 'Houndlich Maneuver'. Without this breakthrough technique, lots of hounds would have no way to save their humans. But with this simple action, we can help our people make it through the traumatic experience that is choking on food. The picture below shows you exactly what to do!

See it is that simple! Go HOSA dogs!